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Scream into the void
Jan. 20th, 2023 06:03 pm![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
snowflake_challenge Challenge #3 In your own space, Scream Into the Void. Get it all out. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.Is there anyone more annoying, frustrating, judgemental and rude as other parents at a school? Most of the time I can ignore them, I can be bemused by them but every once in a while I want to scream at them. That would not be helpful though, but this does give me the perfect vent opportunity.
Although I will say my pre-teen child is very good at putting them in their place with the perfect eyeroll.
And what is it that offends these other parents so much?
My children use my name.
They call me and Blaze 'Colt and Blaze', not mum and dad. The reason is very simple. Neither of us identify as female and are very uncomfortable with being called 'misum', I'm ok with being called 'dad' but Blaze isn't. We tried a few different alternative terms before we agreed, as a family to use names and it works perfectly for us.
According to these other parents however we're teaching our children to be 'disrespectful'.
No, Karen, we're teaching them that every single person on the planet is different, experiences life differently and should be referred to as they want to be - it doesn't matter how they look, you call them the name and pronouns that they ask you do. That is actually being respectful.
Now throw in the fact that in the last couple of months, Eliot has told us they don't know if they 'want to be a boy or a girl'. We sat down and talked about how they're feeling and what they want or need from us, and they have started to use they/them pronouns. They are currently thriving and it's wonderful to see.
Of course, these same parents think this is terrible and wrong and we're just confusing the child.
Yes Karen, you're right. Eliot is confused. That is why we're giving them the time, space, understanding, information and vocabulary they need to try and figure it out in their own time.
They're too young, apparently. Well they're old enough to know that they like dinosaurs, and art, and skateboarding, and football, that their favourite colour is green, that James and Grace are their best friends, they don't like bullies, and hate their name being shortened. I'm pretty sure they know themselves better than anyone else. And that includes their gender.
Another one we hear a lot is 'what if [they] change [their] mind'. Then they change their mind. We start referring to them in the way they request. Literally nothing else changes.
Isn't it absolutely terrible how we listen to our children and treat them with respect?
I have been a Nintendo gamer since the 80s. Christmas 1986, 11 year old me received a NES for Christmas and fell completely in love. It was pretty life-changing. I remember playing Super Mario Bros for the first time, sitting there, right in front of the television for hours trying to beat the game. 2d side-scrolling platformers are still my favourite type of game and I still adore anything with Mario in them. 
His first game appearance was in 1981 as the player character in the arcade game Donkey Kong (one of the earliest platform games, incidentally). He didn't even have a name at this point and was a carpenter referred to as either 'Jumpman' or 'Mr Video', but he was still trying to save the girl - although he was rescuing Pauline from Donkey Kong by running and jumping on platforms, and climbing ladders to ascend a construction site.
